Bird sayings

[Kildale]

Here's a crazy little tale which I made up with bird sayongs. How many can you spot?

They said to me, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket," as I tried to watch the birdie while looking at a bird in the hand, but wishing for the two in the bush.I knew that with a good throw I could kill two birds with one stone, but I didn't worry because, as birds of a feather flock together and as most don't fly by night, they would be there tomorrow. I realised that there may be a few lucky ducks that have flown the coup and got away so, my advice always this: Don't count your chickens before they have hatched. You often may have to be satisfied with a bunch of lame ducks, oh, and don't mention that the birds have flown, but then again, the early bird catches the worm. Always keep your pecker up I say. Get up with the birds, but don't go out naked as a jaybird or people will just think you're as silly as a goose, or a bit of a bird brain, and this may hang around your neck like an albatross for a very long time. It could even be our swan song. If you are up with the lark you could end up with something to crow about, and be able to walk around proud as a peacock. Remember, if you can throw a few stones you could have a chicken in every pot, and if the birds are young like a spring chicken, (as they are scarcer than hen's teeth ) every one would say that you're as wise as an owl and you know how to feather your own nest. With my advice, they won't be saying things like you're cuckoo, or that you run around like a chicken with its head cut off. So don't be a stool pigeon, keep your little secret, and never stick your head in the sand like an ostrich. Always come up with some story so you don't have to eat crow. Let them know that now you don't have to eat like a bird, and you're not bothered if you eat the only bird in a gilded cage, or you don't know which came first, the chicken or the egg. Be proud! Tell them you don't give a hoot about the "Why did the chicken Cross the Road" thing. After all, that's for the birds!They may say you are as silly as a loon. But you know, as the crow flies it sees everything with its bird's eye view and knows that I'm not as bald as a coot, so there!